Off work for an ENTIRE YEAR!!! HOORAY!! You’re so excited!! Sleeping in, watching tv in your pj’s, getting your nails done. HAHAHHA! You’re so funny. Life is about to change very drastically. And here is the absolute first thing you need to know (after you’ve healed from crapping out that bowling ball of course).
Leave your house at least two times per week
Your sanity may very well depend on this. And no, this does not include weekends. I’m talking while the other cat’s away at work (Mon-Fri for most) you need to leave the house. If you have a cat of course, if you don’t, holy crap, you better get a dog or something. OMG, single parents are heroes. And yes, with the rugrat in tow. This is going to be extremely hard in the beginning but it will give you three things you are not going to get at home.
A) Adult contact. The phone is one thing but actually talking to someone face to face is completely different. And I guarantee that there is a playgroup in your area. Find out when and drop by. You’ll be surrounded by women who know exactly how you feel. And yes, they are also probably wearing their track pants.
B) Show off time. Yes, of course you think your baby is the cutest thing on earth BUT so do others. Get your ass out the door and show buttercup off. I guarantee at least one person on every trip is going to say, oh what a sweet baby! Boy? Girl? How old are they? Oh they look like you! This moment of pride will ease the pain of the previous sleepless night complete with under eye circles.
C) You’re forced out of your pajama’s. Laugh all you want but if you didn’t have to get out of your pj’s, would you? Being forced to shower, brush your hair and put on real clothes will actually make you feel better!